PARS TERTIA: VARIATIO PRIMA
I.
Days without asking
Days without thinking
Days without linking
Days without grasping
All is now going
Randomly showing
Showing the prospects
Showing the past
Past all in vain
Vanity finding
To vanity clinging
In vain all to seem
And vain all so seeming
And seeming so vain
So clear
This all
And clear the fall?
And vain all thought,
To nothing brought?
To nothing turns?
From nothing all
To seem right from?
And days not lived
A shadow but -
And where to come
Is where to go?
II.
And places narrowly confine
The truth thought hidden in sublime
The truth of days a truth of night
And nothing here prepared to fight
And dark like night the days now past
And distant questions never asked
And distance gets to be the rule -
And distance sublimates all cruel
And distance reglements all thought -
So nothing past again then fought
And past the tremors now unleashed -
And everyone just now besieged
And all what distant seemed so clear
Has painfully now struck with fear
And distant monsters show their face
And cravingly begins the race
And history a battlefield
That answers once so clear to yield
A tomb become and books are shut
And all connexions seem now cut.
III.
And all the caging gone anew
And thoughts that long ago so flew
Unleashed again and hit the ground
And unprepared now all so found
And joyously, the dark returns
And truth, afraid, her case adjourns
What hidden once is brought to sight
And darkness mixed with brightest light
And shadows, hiding all, descend
And knowledge lost and thoughts now bent
And dust not settles any more
The pyramids of life they tore
And tore apart and fear is might
And nowhere safe a place for flight
And terrors past come close this day -
This day that not a thing will stay
This day of terror so infused
This day of horror unaccused
This day of grinning masks begun -
This day of death and silent stun.
IV.
And all repeats what long thought gone
And all too shocked to start to run
And neverwhere a soul to stand
And neverwhere a helping hand?
This house of horror all consumes
And fakingly false facts illumes
And casts its shadow laughingly
And madness now a place to see
A place once hidden far away
Has hit now home and is to stay
The death is cast and fire's prey
And soon appears so cursed this day
And all unfolded here again
Which once to hide a clever plan
But nothing hidden stays in time
And hidden only the sublime
But horrors foolishly embraced
And devils cowardly not chased
No law can ban, no book encage -
So deep inside stays howling rage.
V.
And lies exposed and new are made
And all reflections soon might fade
And dreams deep down anew to see -
And nightmares nevermore to flee -
And flight to take is time so lost
And flight to take too high a cost
But where to flee?
And where to stay?
This day so lost,
A day disjoint
And hard a day just to avoid,
A day of answers not,
Of silence,
Silence a fake,
Silencing wake
Days running out
Time nears its end
Trust now so lost
Paths all so bent
Silently
Approvingly
All gets a label,
Reality-faker,
Cataloged all,
May we all fall,
May we all falter,
Known is this scheme -
A myth never been -
Always at present
Man-made all times,
Age-old a craving,
Primal a haze.
Lost not the answers,
Lost not the key -
Lost just the spirit
And will, just to see -
And loudly now pounding
And loudly now sounding
The questions at hand
The thought so invoked -
So, where have you been?
VI.
And where are you going?
In silent a place
And peaceful surrounding
No sound
No reprisal
No forceful a pounding
No shaking
No trembling
No hard innovations
And all expectations
For better just turning
But failing to show:
All anticipations
Are fooled innovations
And all easy answers
Just gone in a blink
And gone into hiding
The sense behind all
And blind shalt we be
And follow the piper
The Pied Piper
Let everything
Be over
Soon.
VII.
And then
The old man
Lifted up his eyes
And saw
The wayfarer,
The traveler,
In the street of the city
And the old man
Said to him:
Where are you going?
And whence do you come?[4]
VIII.
False friends
And false hopings
And don't you get out
And don't you let go
For otherwise
Everything
Will be over
Soon
And walk you outside
And walk to the desert
Right into your grave
So, don't you now see?
And why don't you flee?
There's Death
Outside.
IX.
All in your knowing
All in your showing
All in your saying,
Pretending, betraying,
All in your hoping
And silent invoking
Turning to stun
And leads to the end
And pain is a fashion
Not seen as a lesson -
There might be a chance,
A secret just waiting,
And hope in this dating
And hopefully mating
But there is no answer
That still is unknown:
You know.
And see.
Don't want
To go.
X.
And don't want to join.
But pushed now you are.
So this is the end,
Your only friend,
The one outside
The one with the laugh
And neat preparation
And shallow sensation
His music so pounding
The music so sounding
A rhyme, pounding rhythm
Is pushing you forward,
This music
Of the night,
And grasps now your hand.
So this is the end.
You know it, you see it,
And know you can't flee it.
But know still your past -
And know all these days
So empty and vast
And vain such a living
And empty your giving -
A case file you'll be
And that's what you are.
Where are you going -
The answer's outside -
And where have you been -
That's now in behind.
XI.
And now from behind you
The cold hand of death
The cold grasp will bind you
And shove you and guide you
And lend you his hand,
His Red Right Hand,
And pounding your heart
And pounding, so hard,
It knows now its future
And knows it will stop -
And howls deep inside now
And cries to incite you
To stay where you are.
But somehow you smile
Prepare for the ride
And into the night
The trip has to go.
So, now will you show,
Now will you know:
Where are you going.
Where have you been.
XII.
All judging,
All asking
And all silly masking
Now gone in a blink
Deprived and invaded
And shrieking in pain
Inside you the other
Consume you it will
And slowly you'll lose
And go into hiding
And don't see its face.
The evil inside you -
And silently moving
A hold now you're seeking -
Blood -
The places you've been
The places you've seen
The places to be
There's no place to flee
And soon will you see
That these are just stories
And stories they stay.
So what are you doing
And what have you done?
The words to become
And words to distrust
All fade into black
So see you the climax -
So see you the end -
So see you the staging -
And gone is your breath.
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